Catching Up

I'm not quite sure what happened to March. Or April for that matter. It seems that if I even blink an entire month will slip by. At the end of March this little pumpkin turned 5 months-old. Here he is with my parents' dog, Baylee:

The peace and understanding that seem to hit most mothers at 4 months postpartum finally gave me a breather at around 5 months. I've heard so many other moms say things like "Things are finally getting easier" at around the 3 or 4 month mark, and I panicked a little because I just wasn't there yet. Ryder is such a laid-back, easy-going baby...so I'm pretty sure the fault was all mine. Going from one kid to two was a lot harder than I thought it would be. Of course it has been more rewarding than I could have imagined as well, but I have definitely had to adjust my way of thinking and expectations.

One of the biggest things I have had to adjust to is lack of free-time. I am totally one of those people that needs a little bit of 'alone' time a day. With a 5 year-old and 6 month-old I found it to be virtually impossible to carve out that time. So I found myself staying up late at night when everyone was in bed to read or just relax and be. Of course I would wake up drained and exhausted the next morning. John always asks, "Why do you do this to yourself?" I can't explain why this time is so precious and vital to me; it just is. And I definitely notice a difference in myself when I go many days without any time to myself to recharge. So....I am still trying to find a balance :)

Have I mentioned my son is a child of many expressions? No? Well, it is part of his charm and a big reason why we laugh constantly in his presence. Sometimes he'll start off with this face...

After he see's us laughing at his serious face, he breaks into this expression....

I had to add the next picture because I wanted to remember his squishy, chubby thighs and calves:

On Easter:

with Nana and Papa:

with uncle Andy:

showing off his new trick:

playing the usual game of "Guess how long Ryder can chew my finger with his gums before it really hurts and I start screaming":

Ryder still loves to be swaddled to sleep. We've accepted the fact that we will probably be swaddling him with a bed sheet when he is 16. No biggie.

As you can see, his feet don't even stay swaddled any more.

John's parents, Gam Gam and Pepaw came to visit:

Please excuse our lack of cabinets in the background. We had the glorious idea to refinish them, and it has turned into a beast of a project.

Nap-time has taken a hit this month. We are not sure why. Ryder used to be such a good napper. He would sleep for 2 to 3 hours at a time, twice a day. Now, he sleeps for only 30-45 minutes at a time, 2-3 times a day. 

At the end of April, our little guy turned 6 months-old.

His sissy is still his favorite person.

We decided to let Ella feed Ryder rice cereal for the first time. She was so excited. She brought the spoon to his lips and waited until he opened them. When he didn't, she turned around to John and me and said, "If he does this [motions with her hand to Ryder's closed mouth] then you just have to CRAM it in there." And then she proceeded to do just that. Stunned, John and I were like, "Okay. Cram it in. Got it."

There can never be too many hands on the spoon:

Perhaps ruminating on the horror that is mashed peas:

Ryder's weight is 15lbs and 13oz. He is such a joy to be around. He is the most care-free/content baby, and I cannot get enough of his sweet self. 

"I know that Ryder is my baby brother...but he's also my friend."

- Ella Smith on the way to kindergarten one morning

4 months

How on earth has 4 months passed already? Man, I wish it would slow down. Ryder looks so different than he did in the beginning. My mother-in-law sent me this picture from their visit when he was 4 weeks old:

He was still so orange from his jaundice. I looked like a zombie. I'm pretty sure I didn't know what day it was. If you asked me a question back then, it took--on average--about 10 seconds to even process that I had been asked a question. And then another minute to articulate a coherent answer. I was betting on having it 'together' by 4 months. I'm glad I didn't wager any money on that bet.

We're definitely getting used to this new normal of having two kids. In this house, if you are called by the right name within two tries, you count yourself lucky. Poor Ella now responds to, "Sophie-John-Ryder-I mean Ella--whoever you are!" At least Ryder doesn't hear us when we say, "Can you go get her. She's up from her nap. I mean him!" Twice in the last month I have been so out-of-it when I took a shower that I forgot to rinse out the conditioner. The sad part is I didn't even get back in to rinse it off. I mean, I had already put lotion on my legs when I realized it. Surely by 6 months I'll have a better grasp on reality.

4 month stats:

Weight: 13lbs 7oz. This is a long way from the 5lbs 11oz Ryder came into the world at. He weighed 12lbs 8oz at 3 months and 10lbs 14oz at 2 months.

Feeding: Ryder still eats every 2 to 3 hours during the day (usually every 2 hours) and only once at night.

Naps: Whereas Ryder used to take long, predictable naps, now they are a little more scattered. I still put him down around the same times every day, but they range anywhere from 45 minutes to 2.5 hours. He takes 2 to 3 naps a day.

Sleep: He usually only wakes up once a night (of course now that I type it he will probably wake up every 3 hours again). Recently, he has gone a couple of nights sleeping until 5 AM and then goes back to sleep until I have to get him up at 7 AM to bring Ella to school. More often than not, though, he wakes around 3 AM for his nightly feeding. He goes to bed between 7 PM and 8 PM.

Disposition: Ryder seems a little more shy than Ella was, even at 4 months. He's quiet when he first wakes up, and it takes a little bit before the babbling begins. But when he warms up, he will talk your ear off and giggle when you look at him. John and I always talk about how vocal and smiley he is with us and how he gets so quiet around others. It is like a totally different baby. He's always just taking things in and quietly observing his surroundings and the people in it.

Reflux: Boy, this is our biggest issue right now. We go through at least 5 outfits a day due to massive amounts of spit-up. I won't even go into what this has done to our furniture and carpet.

We've started physical therapy for the torticollis, and it seems to be working. His tummy time has improved so much. Ryder still prefers to look to the right if he's being held or laying on his back. However, we have noticed that he will just about break his neck to turn around to the left and look at the TV if Ella is watching Strawberry Shortcake. Maybe we just needed the right motivation.

My favorite time with Ryder is when I get him up in the morning. Usually, he's already awake and stirring. I love looking over his crib and waiting for him to see me and grin. He kicks his legs wildly and giggles until I get him out.  

"Yep, Ryder definitely has prince-potential." - Ella Smith (looking over at her brother and making an observation to herself after watching a Disney princess movie) 

Sister

To the outside world we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We live outside the touch of time.  ~Clara Ortega

I'm uploading this video because there is something about it that I want to remember forever. Not the dirty house in the background. Definitely not the tired mom without make-up. Not even the baby boy who laughs in it. He was the reason for filming it, but he isn't what I think is most precious about it.

No, what is most special is the little girl holding the camera. I love her tip on how to make baby brother laugh (whom she accidentally refers to as "her"). I really love the way she laughs in response to him.

It is the same little girl who carries a picture of her brother in her backpack.

The same one who tells me everyday before she leaves for school, "Make sure and tell Ryder I love him."

The same one who's had her world turned upside down after being an only-child for five years.

The same one who continues to shine and be silly and sing out-loud.

The same one with an unwavering faith in God. And in people.

Her brother's favorite person in the whole world.

I look up to her for more reasons than she'll ever begin to understand.

February

What a crazy couple of weeks it has been. The very night after my last post Ryder decided that he would start waking up every 3 hours again. That lasted for a week. Ughhh. He's back to only waking up once a night, but who knows how long that will last. Playing with his sissy one morning:

Ryder had his baby dedication at church a few weekends ago, and it was such a special occasion. Here he is just moments before we had to take him down to the front. Don't let this picture of serenity fool you. He had a blow-out seconds later. John looked up at me with panic and rushed to the restroom to conduct the quickest diaper change ever.

We took Ryder to the pediatrician a few days after he turned 3 months old because we were worried about some developmental delays. Particularly, during tummy-time. We noticed that he was unable/unwilling to lift his head anymore and that he only faced one way. Even when we held him, he only looked to the right. If something he was looking at moved to his left side, he would quit tracking it with his eyes all together. He just didn't want to turn his head. It turns out he has congenital tortucollis, which basically means the neck muscle that runs up and toward the back of Ryder's neck (sternocleidomastoid muscle) is shortened. This brings his head down and to one side. We start physical therapy tomorrow morning to stretch his tight neck muscle. As you can see, he's not worried a bit:

My parents continue to swoop in and rescue us by picking up Ella from school once or twice a week. Last Friday they picked her up and also had her spend the night so that John and I could have a date night. We sometimes bring Ryder to their house for a few hours also so that we can actually have a date sans kids. However, this particular night he was so fussy, and we didn't want Nana and Papa to have to deal with that. He was also still recovering from his first ear infection. We were totally prepared to get to the restaurant and then turn around and leave. He surprised us, though, and fell asleep half-way through our meal.

Life has been so busy lately that John and I rarely have time to indulge in free-time or home projects. The Saturday morning following our date night we were able to try our hand at a photo-wall in the stairwell. For a year and a half we have had nothing on the stairwell walls. Let me tell you, it is a ton harder to arrange pictures and have them at a slope than I ever imagined. Even so, it was such a treat to drink coffee and talk with John while we did this project together. Ryder just fell asleep on a blanket on the landing.

The weekend before Valentine's Day Ella's school held their annual Daddy/Daughter Sweetheart Dance. I desperately wanted to go and take pictures and see Ella at her first dance, but this event was only reserved for little girls and their daddies. John (with his Conan hair) and Ella bella:

 I laughed so hard when John told me about the dance that evening. He said some dads really got into the dancing and went crazy when a Katy Perry song came on. Haha! I wish I could have seen it.

Ryder has really started laughing when we kiss his neck. Sometimes it is just giggles, and sometimes it is a belly-laugh. Then, he'll stop abruptly like the sound of his own laughter has startled him. We weren't able to capture the belly-laugh in the video, but we did get some giggling.

3 Months

Dear Ryder,

How incredible it is that you have managed to secure such a big place in our hearts in such a short time. You are such a joy to be around and so easy to take out to places. The only things you ever fuss about are hunger and sleepiness. And even then, you give us ample amount of time before whimpering ever turns into crying. Every night before I go to bed I look forward to what the next day brings with you. Your smiles have doubled since last month.

We love your expressive eyebrows. You get that from Daddy.

One of the sweetest parts of having you in our family is seeing your sissy with you. She loves you so much and makes sure to show you every day. In fact, you smile and giggle more for her than for anyone else. We're so proud of your sister. This has been a tough adjustment for her, and she is doing so great.

We have no idea how much you weigh this month, but judging from your double chin and voluptuous muscular chest, you are gaining at a good rate. Sometimes we call you Big Bubby.

You finally like sitting in the bumbo,

 but you like it best when "friends" join you.

Tummy-time is still a work in progress.  Sometimes you pop right up like a parrot,

but most of the time you don't like to lift your head very much while laying flat on your tummy. It makes you spit-up quite a bit, even hours after you have eaten.

You often fall asleep during it.

You do so well if you are in the upright position sitting on our lap or being held against our shoulder. You sit up straight, and your head barely even bobbles. Spit-up after feedings is becoming a bigger problem, and we usually have to change your outfits many times during the day.

You seem to have discovered your hands and always have them in your mouth.

Sometimes you really wrestle being swaddled at bedtime because of this. A couple of times we tried to leave your arms out, but you could never fall asleep that way. Speaking of sleep, you are doing so much better at night. Finally! You have gone 4 out of the last 5 nights only waking up once at night. I nurse you around 7:30 p.m. and then put you down at 8 p.m. You usually wake up around 3 a.m. Then again around 6 a.m.

In the mornings we have a couple of hours to spend together after we drop Ella off at kindergarten. We miss her so much and talk about how we can't wait to go and pick her up at 12:15. But I also love this time with you, too.

Daddy and I are so happy that God gave us the chance to raise a little boy. If we were being completely honest, we would have to admit that we were nervous about having a boy. We only knew the magic of little girls. But you showed us, didn't you? 

Sweet boy, you took us all by surprise. Especially me.

Thank you for being patient with me as I fumble through all the newness of having a baby around again. You've been taking it easy on me; I know you have. Miraculously, you still manage to grow and thrive and smile and giggle in spite of all the mishaps and mistakes I've made.

I fall more hopelessly in love with you every day.

Love,
Mommy